So, I started a couple of spews yesterday, at the end of 2014, trying to put down something cute and provoking. But, nothing would flow. Decided to begin the New Year off, doing what I enjoy most...nothing and eating. Oh, and of course, drinking coffee. Ahhh...if I can be blessed enough to continue this throughout the year, life will be pretty good.
However, as I sat, and drank, and ate, I figured I had best take the remaining Christmas stuff down, and pack it away. The only things left were the lights in the window, and the job just took moments. As I wrapped the last set of lights up, and put them down, I was struck by the knowledge that they would be put away for another year. Almost 355 days will pass, before they will be hauled out again. Will I haul them out, myself? Or will events during this time occur, that cause these decorations to sit, never to be put up again? I am not feeling morbid, I simply realize that so very much can happen, between the beginning of a year, and the end of it. Nothing is safe and secure, life is, indeed, precious.
Those things we keep telling ourselves are important, money, homes, jobs, they mean nothing when life ends. I suppose this feeling of dread, is because, somewhere in this world, today, right this moment, parents, children, friends, are feeling the pain of the loss of loved ones. I know that just moments into this New Year, people up the road from my warm and cozy home, lost their lives. I doubt I know them, but, that doesn't make the pain I feel any less. I know that each of these people were connected to families, who probably sat about their own cozy homes last night, watching the old year pass, and welcoming the New in, only to have their year begin with devastating news, that will change their lives forever.
Birthdays, anniversaries, Easter, Thanksgiving, Christmas and, of course, the bright and shining clean and unsullied New Year, all times for celebration All chock full of meaning and tradition, and most of all, family and friends. Not a single one of these times are enjoyed while alone. They are times to be together with those you love, and hold dear.
Many years ago, I had a Christmas that was difficult, the Christmas we realized was my Mother's last. Because of timing, my parents were in Vancouver at the hospital on Christmas Day. My brother and I decided we would wait until she was able to come home, to celebrate Christmas. In our hearts, the 25th, was NOT set in stone, Christmas was the date we could all be together.
The big New Years count downs, well, haven't been a part of those for many years. My honey and I try to ensure we speak on the phone, as one year fades into the next, just our way of being together, because usually he is in camp on this night. I no longer feel that anticipation, waiting for the magic of a clean slate, because, reality is, the bills continue, life moves along as it wishes, and the important things, remain the same..or so I hope.
I have my own New Year wishes, sure I would love to win the lotto, but that is a dream, not really a wish.(just had to put that in, just in case)
The wishes, well, I wish those families, who today are burdened with grief, find the strength to bear the pain, I wish that this time, next year, all of my family and friends are happy and healthy, and I am able to share the special times with them. I wish people did not have to suffer.
I find myself , suddenly thinking beyond my own tiny world, beyond my worries, and hopes. I am a very lucky woman, I have a wonderful partner, my children all seem to care about me, I have amazing friends, but, today, all I can think of, are those families who will begin the year with tears and sorrow. My heart goes out to them, and all those who are in pain. I think this comes with age, it comes with understanding, time is not always kind, nor gentle, time, as they say, waits for no man. The New Year is simply a date, it is a single moment, in time. We have made it special, in our minds, but, in truth, we cannot control the important things in life, we can only hope we get to keep them for another year.
So, today, and tomorrow, and all of the days I am gifted (because they are truly gifts) , I wish to let all of those people (and of course my puppies)who are the important "things" in my life, know, I am so very thankful for each one of you. I hope that this time, next year, I am able to tell you all again,when I wish for yet another year.
May the New Year bring Joy, Health, and the ability to share time with what is truly important!