I know, lots of these have been a bit off topic, and this one may appear to be the same. However, I really must put this down, as it is eating away at the small amount of gray matter I have left, and my cold tiny heart as well.
This blog was started because a couple of folks at work, pressured me into writing it. I admit, I have often spoke about wanting to write a book, in fact, there are. perhaps, at least 2 books floating about in limbo (between my ears). So, after hearing my dream, over and over, it was suggested I start off doing this.
Oh, they were all going to help me, and, I suppose in someway, they have, but the ideas of what to plop down in print, if I were to rely on co-workers, would consist of about 3 posts! Alright, I'm not bashing you guys, but many times I blather on, simply because you have not given me any ideas, and I must dig deep into my own brain (which is like a frigging Rubik's cube , things never line up properly) and the poor readers end up with my rantings.
What I write, is who I am!! I do not candy coat, I try very hard to be totally honest, and I never set out to be hurtful. I have never implied that I am politically correct, if I was, I would certainly be farther ahead in life. As far as I am concerned, being politically correct, is being a liar, or, at least it would be in my case.
Do I dream of Utopia? Nope, not really! If everyone was the same, had the same, then there would be nothing to strive for, right? So, in truth, the perfect world is a different dream for individuals. In my world, I would have tons of money!!!Go ahead, say it "money isn't everything"! Well, sure, I know that. However, I have been lucky enough to find a wonderful man, I have family, and as far as I know, I am reasonably healthy, so...that leaves the issue on how to be able to do everything I want. The solution for that is....money!
But...I also have my humungous problem of speaking my mind, and the lack of political correctness. I cannot suck hole, I can't keep silent when something is very wrong, and in all honesty, I think that is possibly why we are not wealthier than we are. My head, heart and mouth are all connected.
I have tried to be quiet, but all who know me, will likely state, they missed that moment. What ends up happening if I do this, is, I get sick. O.K. I make myself sick. If something rubs me the wrong way, and I don't speak my mind, it will nag at me, and I in turn, will start nagging at those close, and everyone will have a headache.
Like I mentioned, my refusal to become a Lemming, has caused some grief, and is partially to blame for a few of the bumps in the road of our lives. But, when I stand at the edge of my very last cliff, I will do so with the knowledge that I did not have to pretend to be someone I was not. Those who I picked to be a part of my life (and those poor individuals who did not have a choice) will be able to say that they truly knew me, because what you see and hear, is exactly who I am!!!
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